"Stop helping everyone"

I put the above headline in quotes because this is what my husband said to me the other day when I was going through my schedule for the week. He meant it sincerely and he is right.

About a month ago I made a commitment to myself to "stop the chaos" in my life. Approximately seventy-five percent of that Chaos comes from me always saying "yes" to everyone. It seems that, although my heart is in the right place, it is not always the right decision.

Helping people is good, but only when it doesn't interfere with helping yourself. It can sometimes even become a crutch that keeps you from pursuing your dreams. The helping myself procrastination, my modus operandi, is really fear staring me in the face. As this monster is looming in front of me I can smell its bad breath, but still, I am unable to acknowledge it's glaring eyes. I peer around it, below it and above this smelly monster, but still I can't seem to see it head on.

Facing our fears and moving ourselves forward towards our greater good will always bring that hairy, scary monster front and center. Try to avoid him all you want but he will endure. Offering him a breath mint won't make him go away either. I know because I have tried this tactic and it hasn't worked. The secret to making that smelly dude history is to stare him down. Show him who is boss. Plant your feet in the ground, Stare him in the eye(s), show him some 'tude and tell him, "go ahead, make my day."

It's time to listen to my own advice. I realize that if I really want to change my modus operandi then I am going to have to take a deep breath, look that monster in the eye and let him know I am the executor of my dreams and I am willing to take the first step in helping myself and making my dreams come true. Poof! All that is left is the essence of stinky breath mints.

Until he returns again and I am sure he will, I promise to continue on my quest to stop the chaos. Here's to the lessons that I have learned by helping everyone.

Thank you folks!

Jilli Kae

A guest blog from hubby

In periods of uncertainty, be it economic, health or other life changing events, we can harbor all kinds of negative thoughts. Against ourselves, people, the government, etc. But these thoughts don't need to be negative. In fact thinking negatively can lead to negative outcomes. Positive thoughts on the other hand can lead to better futures. This isn't foo-foo, it's science, mind over matter. All the greats have done it (my favorite example is Steve Jobs…but I'm part geek). Take a bad situation make the best of it and turn yourself around.

Right now we're smack-dab in the middle of a situation like this, and it's been a long drawn out matter. If Jill and I wallowed incessantly we'd have gone nuts by now. But with the time we've had we've kept our wits about us and processed, planed and kept our thoughts positive.

Now, we are still aways away from a resolution but we have already begun to feel the impact of the positive thinking. We have a grasp on the matter, looked at our lives and ourselves and found that things aren't so bad. Actually it's been the reverse, we are looking forward to a change in our lives. That's how we have reprocessed the negative thinking and that became its outcome.

Thank you Jill. It's your mindset rubbing of on a worry-wart like me that's making the difference.

LUVUL

Ed

Shameless plugs:

ed-brandt.com

square15.com

A new journey for Jilli Kae

What's the scoop on Jilli Kae? As, I told many of you when I was closing my store, I was ready for a change and I was going to be open to whatever my next adventure would be. Since closing the doors, I have come to realize how much I no longer want to be in retail. That ship has sailed. I am ready to reinvent my self.

Well, my next door has opened. While writing my first article I rediscovered a talent that has brought me a sense of joy and freedom that I have not felt for a long while. And as I cross this threshold, I would like to invite you to join me in this new experience, of stepping outside my box of who I thought I was and stepping into who I am now.

I remember someone telling me, "write what you know". So I am setting out on an adventure to do just that. The theme of my writing will probably change day to day or even hour to hour, because every moment of everyday brings me something to ponder and dissect. As I am a mood dresser, I am also a mood writer, so this blog is sure to be something different all time.

I hope that I will inspire, conspire and provoke conversation. I have left the comment option available and I invite you to get involved, but please, keep it clean and keep it real.

Cheers to a new journey,

Jilli Kae